Like, RPP 
My very own mantra. My new way of life. It is stunning how little needs to change in order to reveal a new horizon.
I had some insights lately, which made me feel in preschool. I’ve been reading books on spirituality since I was 13. There was a time, where I thought (yeah, keep thinking) I had nothing more to learn. There was a time of great pretension and self-deception. Things have changed. I have changed. I’m honest now, as much as I can bear.
And during all this time of spiritual searching, I never realized that I can’t possibly have inner peace without channelling my energies. For me, spiritual understanding and awareness had nothing to do with a well-mannered energy flow. How is this possible? I don’t know. It just never “clicked” inside my head. I guess I was probably too busy feeling pain and self-pity and liking it. I was probably too busy running against walls.
So, up until now I somehow hadn’t realized I have to guide the energies inside me consciously in order to accumulate life force (Chi, Kundalini or whatever they call it). I was basically living in total chaos. Hello? And it gets better. I hadn’t realized either that it is life force we need in order to develop spiritually. The can’t be no spiritual development when our energy level is low. Spirituality needs high energy levels. And high energy levels can be obtained when you tame the energies inside you and make them behave, instead of running wild like a herd of monkeys. A herd of monkeys makes a lot of noise. No wonder I couldn’t hear my own heart whispering inside the madhouse.
Great. Now that it’s clear, let’s get specific. How do you channel your energies? With physical exercise. Right. There is no other way. You have to incorporate the body in the process, you can’t leave it aside and ignore it. After all, the body is the vessel. You don’t know how many hours of martial arts, yoga, swimming and gymnastics I have behind me. I know. And I never even once realized what it was all about. I was doing it mechanically. I never understood it was something I could use to trigger tranquility and accumulate Chi. Almost every spiritual teaching involves a lot of physical exercise in some way. Exercise that leads to a growing consciousness. How is it possible this whole concept is new to me?
I feel like I’m inventing the wheel. Of course, I could plunge myself into a swamp of self-accusations, guilt and regrets. Like I would usually do. Not only does that waste my entire life energy, but it leads to absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. And maybe it’s not a bad thing that I’m 26. My body is still young and flexible, I can catch up a lot. I could be 46, just think about it. And even then, nothing is impossible.
RPP is what I need now. Rhythm. Persistence. Patience. I don’t have a a very good sense of rhythm. I need to cultivate that. I’m not very patient. I need to become. I’m not persistent either. I give up when first difficulties arise. But without that I will continue running in circles. Frustrated and unsatisfied. This is not something I want for myself. I need to grow slowly, but constantly, push the boundaries, but not run into them, I need to accept that there are things I cannot understand yet, because I am not ready to live them. I need to accept that the readiness grows with the life force we have. I need to pay more attention. See the dogs and the flowers. Hear the birds. I need to breathe. I need to exercise. I don’t need to read that much anymore. But dare more. Explore more. Stand up for myself. Be strong. Be centered. The practice is in the process.
Rhythm. Persistence. Patience.
So be it.
